Taking time to enjoy some moments...

I have been down in the dumps-- or maybe just digging in that "hole"-- for quite sometime now... I am still trying to climb my way out, but it's not moving very quickly... at least not quick enough for me... there have been some fun and positive things happening lately, but haven't had enough energy to creatively  blog about them... let alone sit back and enjoy the moments, although I am trying too... so here is my first attempt:... although I don't have much time now either, but I do need a break and need to release some thoughts from my plugged up head.

so anywho...I will go back a few weeks and share with you the joy soccer is bringing to my oldest boy.

The Easter bunny had excellent timing, bringing him an "official" size 3 soccer ball AND shin guards!!  Soccer practice started just after he delivered the perfect treat for an eager little boy! 

What choas the soccer fields are for a first time "soccer mom". Yes, I suppose that is what I am now... the soccer mom!... I feel as if I was everything but before the title found me, but I enjoy it now... the beginning of the first practice -- I wasn't so sure I could handle it.  Isaac, Trevor, and I all head to the fields... swarmed by other eager kids and annoyed parents and these tiny little signs that most of the crowd was covering-- the signs were suppose to help me figure where we are going... I was on the hunt for practice field K4.  Now... I had read the "map" but had it backwards in my mind... obviously........I parked pretty close (well at least I thought) to the fields... I saw the alphabetized fields and thought I had found the perfect parking spot and thought, "wow I can handle this!!"  I was actually running on time and headed in the right direction....of course that didn't last long.  The BIG kids use the Alphabetized fields, then there are some numbered fields for who?? I am sure one day I will figure that out too.... then there are 12 "K" for Kindergarten fields.... so I wasn't even close to the accurate practice field.

Tired little Trevor was hungry and cold... eager big Isaac was pointing at every field... "Is that my team??"... "Is that one it, mom?"... I finally actually said out loud... "I have NO IDEA Isaac"... and some dad that was feeling my painful call  (OK it wasn't that bad---it was getting there, but not that bad yet??!!)  Said to me "First time?"... yeah was I that obvious and he stated that the small kiddos are with the yellow nets...although he didn't know where they were at least now I knew what I was looking for........

Well after what felt like 15 mins (was probably only 3...) and a trip around the entire soccer area... I finally approached a seasoned parent (at least she looked like it!!) and asked them if they knew where I was supposed to be??-- She happened to be a parent on the team playing on K4... THE WEEVILS!!!... Go Weevils!

There was no yellow net in sight... They weren't going to be using them this first practice... oh of course not....So we found our field!!!  relief...

So again, we were just a little later than I wanted to be (nothing new there) and Isaac didn't bring his ball...cuz I didn't think he needed it.. (and yes... you should bring a ball if you have one!...) and this soccer mom kept his shin guards in her sweatshirt pocket, just in case he needed them (you know to protect the shins that I store in there too) as I cuddled with Trevor (it was a chilly evening) --who constantly wanted to know where his daddy was???...I began to watch a 5 year old boy totally enjoy his first actual sporting event.

He was glowing!  I am not so sure that he ever quit "jumping" so to speak-- anticipating whatever he gets to do next... it was fun to watch him "keep an eye on" his teammates to learn what to do --- that is it, the moment I knew that my little boy was growing up and was going to be able to take care of himself (ok, so it's just the start)  But I teared up a bit thinking about it -- finally some happy tears running down my face... just a few...no one noticed!!! ;)

Mid practice... a whole 15 minutes... the coach (who is just a parent of a teammate) said go get a drink... poor Isaac was like.. "Where?"...with good intentions, cuz he knew I didn't have any water... Lesson learned there too... As practice wrapped up, I was told -- Mom, he needs shin guards for practice and the games, "Oh, like these I have in my pocket??" They just laughed at me -- (In my defense, everyone was wearing them under their pants and I figured it would have been mentioned if he needed them!!) SO:  bring ball, wear shin guards, and fill a water bottle!

Trevor, the spectator...with HIS ball.

Then onto the first game day!... I am surprised Isaac slept the night before he was so excited... I anticipated correctly that I didn't know where I was going...Joe was working again, so I hauled my 2 boys through the crowd... each carrying a ball (Trevor couldn't be left out.. and of course his was the gigantic play ball we had)... I had a bag full of blankets and a few snacks...oh and of course the water bottle and off we went, on the search for the yellow nets...I wasn't quite as dramatic as the first search!



Isaac Playing in his first soccer game!

Isaac enjoyed his game, but as we had practiced He kind of hung around the "huddled" group of kids that encroached the soccer ball... and danced around them waiting for that all important "pass" we had been working on!... We have since used the approach... "KICK it hard toward the right net"!!!!!  I guess our strategy had to change with the game too!... I wanted him to be that "team" player, but he is already in other ways!!! Telling his teammates good job, and cheers for them!!!! 

Makes my heart happy!

THEN -- the BIG moment.. in game number 2!!!

He had been using the kick it hard advice and he scored his first goal!!!!!!  HE was so pumped!... It made me very happy, cuz he looked for me almost immediately to make sure I saw what he had accomplished!  Trevor was even clapping!!  It was a moment that I needed!!  I needed to enjoy my little boy's pride in himself and knowing that there are still these little things in life that I can still look forward too.  ( I am sorry for the delay on the excitement -- it is hard to find now days -- although it is as equally important that they still exist and I am grateful for them!!)

At practice tonight...we brought the filled water bottle... but another note I should have made to myself...watch the youngest brother--he drank 3/4s of the bottle before break time...Oops

P.S.... I have since helped other lost parents and some grandparents too I think!!!  -- so I guess I am that soccer mom after all!

The WHOLE or the hole???

Well the whole truth is... it is very chaotic in the Beland world lately... yes even more so then the last blogs...

We are trying to make a smooth moving transition...but here is my upcoming weekend: I work on Friday and some family are going to start the rummage sale...then Saturday we will continue the rummage sale...Sunday we are moving out... oh and I have 4 cakes to do throughout the weekend too... just to add some excitement, I would like to finish my brother-in-laws wedding flowers before we move... so I don't have to move that stuff too... we can't forget about soccer either!

We have a great family... all willing to help... and that will help soooo much. 

But after that whole adventure.... in the end we head over to the "hole" as Joe called it... and that brings me to the funny story...

We were hauling probably our 5th load over to the apartment... and as we were pulling into the apartment parking lot, Joe stated... to me... Welcome to the "hole"...well as I have stated before... KIDS HEAR EVERYTHING>... so Isaac questioned... where is there a hole?... Joe and I just laughed (under our breath as best we could)... but now its our inside joke.... as Joe backed into 1 of 2 of our parking spots (No garage no balcony... heck hardly a kitchen)...We were trying to avoid answering the inquiring minds in that back.. by this time Trevor had joined in... almost drilling us (they must get that quality from their daddy!)  But they REALLY wanted to know where this hole was...THANKFULLY...

There actually was a hole right there were our parking spot was....phewwwww we didn't need to explain that one!  YET!... But now EVERY trip we move more pieces of our life... we hear about this hole... at Number 26.  Trevor is striving to say "26"... It is getting there... maybe by the time we move out of the whole apartment life and stop tripping on the hole in parking spot 26.

(So it really is that so called "hole" though)  I thought I was making things easier on me... avoiding the transfer of Kindergarten for this year, speech re-evals for a new school, and T-ball throughout the summer... I will deal with it now but I know that accomplishing those tasks may have just been easier.

We got the apartment on the 21st of April...so moving slowing... but we ended up have to clean... I mean SCRUB -- EVERYTHING in the apartment... it was filthy and GROSS.  We were so warn out from 3 1/2 hours of hard work...There wasn't even energy to argue about the horrible new living quarters we will be occupying.....Soooooooon... tooooo sooooooon.  The oven (from 1960) was sparkling and so was the fridge... NOTHING and I mean nothing else was touched until we conquered it.  = YUCK

But its done, its temporary and thanks goodness for those 2 things. 

So moving on into a whole new life...but into a hole of itself first... but as a quote I saw on pinterest said, "All great things are preceded by chaos."  Let's hope so.... for a relief of stress needs to be in the near future. 

We move out on the 10th of May... WISH us luck!

Timeless...

As my venture into a new career has taken much longer than anticipated... I have also ventured into a "fun" new job... it does pay I guess, but it is a great way to get out of the house and a "good" reason for the kids to get to go to daycare -- other than just "holding" our spot.  Not that, that is how my wonderful daycare provider is... but I still have that feeling in my chest... saying... why am I bringing my kids to daycare when I am home.... Still.... they need to go and I wouldn't want to change that one bit... hoping and praying for them to go full-time very shortly, but for now...they can just enjoy their friends and time at "friend's house" (That is what we had to call it instead of daycare when Isaac first switched after Trevor's maternity leave.. cuz he, 2 at the time, didn't want to go to "daycare," but "friends house" seemed like a great place to spend the day!!!)
As my mother stated tonight on a phone conversation...It can be my creative outlet for a while... yeah.... that is exactly what it is...(although I have an abundance of cake decorating to do in the next few weeks...minus a freezer...so creativity may just be depleting....)

Ranunculus

I have always enjoyed flower arranging... I am very glad that she is in charge of keeping the fresh flowers fresh and ordering what the customers want!!!... Because the biggest challenge is figuring out what the flowers are called... ok, ok... I know what a rose is... but the colors of roses aren't just... red, white... etc... there are some amazing roses... and other flowers that I didn't even know existed!!!  The ranunculus is one of my new favorite flowers... and it comes in ALOT of different colors!!

She is still (and will be) very much in charge of the fresh arrangements... I get to do a few... and assist in many, but today I made 3 silk arrangements (one wreath)... !! my forte.. I guess in a flower shop anyway.  I really enjoyed it... I put flip flops on a wreath with some bright yellow spider mums!!!! I love it... and "grass" as the greens!!!  It is fun, I hope someone will love it for there home!...

I have helped her create a facebook page for her business.. we still need to improve on it... she has a TON of wedding rental items that just aren't "out" there being used the way they should be yet... that is my next goal for her... to get that going and I would love to help!!!... But check out her page...

facebook.com/timelessmemoriesfloralandgift

She took a big chance on me as I don't have any fresh floral experience and/or retail expertise either...but as she has said... I can tie a bow! and have a creative spark in me somewhere!!  I am grateful for the opportunity and am enjoying it as well....!!!...

Better come and visit me... be quick as the flip flop wreath may not be there long!!!

big, BiGgEr, BIGGEST

I know it has been quite a while since I visited (posted), but on the stressed out scale from big to BIGGEST.. there is really a whole world turned upside down with major commotions in our lives.  I didn't know even how to express them in writing--I really, maybe, I should have more often, as it would release some of this tension--isn't that why I started this anyway??!!  The unexpected, the uncontrollable, the underestimated, the whole roller coaster of life... we have had about as many ups and downs (more downs than ups) than is possible and all in the last 2 months.  I sure have taken on alot...and it is very stressful in that I can't "plan" it or, organize anything...it is all still up in the air and I have no control whatsoever...
Just to freshen my list in my head and somewhat catch you up...

{We will start simple-- although at moments it doesn't seem so 'simple' and can easily take over as a BIGGEST stressor at the time) --Trevor has a cold and refuses to take medicine that isn't grape flavored... He is also an exaggerated 'Trevor' as we know him -- even more persistent when he is sick (typical male???!).}  It is a sinus/head cold and there isn't anything I can find in grape for that... he is currently napping, I may just let him sleep until the a.m. (its 3 pm now!!) -- that is what I should be doing napping...I need to start going to bed earlier.. it keeps getting later and later, with no real reason to be well rested in the morning...why not stay up...bummer. 

Isaac started soccer practice last Monday---and he LOVES it!.. of course.. it is all running ---actually I was quite surprised at all the "huddling" around the ball the team does... Isaac kind of dances around the huddle waiting for a pass.......as that is how we practice.. passing to each other....so I guess we really need to just get him in the "huddle" action... but he was grinning the ENTIRE time, so that lightens the stress load a bit.. just knowing there is something that can ease the mind and knowing that we can still just have a fun time and enjoy life... even during these stressful months.   T-ball and Kindergarten are just around the corner... new speech schedules too... should be interesting with (hopefully by then) a new job!

I have numerous cakes to decorate in the rest of April and beginning of May... good YES.. bad... YES... I love to do them 9and to see the results please my customers, they bring in some $$$, but we sold our freezer (getting a HUGE one in the new house!!!)--which means no preparing ahead of time-- and the kids go to daycare part time, but still...(and there is packing and a rummage sale to get ready) so even though in theory there is all this "time"... where is it???  constantly on the go....still....how does that happen? 

oh that HUSBAND... probably an entire different blog day for that... lol!!.. but he also seems to imagine a "time" that I have on my hands to do crazy and unnecessary things.... if only he really knew what I did.. pretty sure he thinks I look at pinterest and facebook and blog... all day long........not so much (of course I check it... duh!!!!)... but not nearly like he assumes...oh I am probably taking 3 hour naps too...and never making supper........

oh yeah... and that little thing called selling our house, and moving and getting the next house and apartment life going......

Well there is one thing I can control right now.. It will be the most organized move EVER... well in my life anyway.. these last few weeks in our current home will be filled to the brim with organizing the PERFECT move... We received news (good for once--) that we are moving ahead with and will probably have to be out of the house on May 10th.  (that is just around the corner!!!!!  The appraiser should be through by the beginning of next week (CROSS your fingers-- that there isn't a huge stressor around the corner from the results of that too-- I don't foresee anything, but then again..... such is my life right now!) 

We already have a BEAUTIFULLY smallllllllll... no (ok so its little) kitchen {to bake cakes ;(--I have 2 weddings in June.... uuuurrrrggghhhhhh } 2 bedroom apartment that I am not sure if my bed will fit in my new room... apartment lined up... but we settled on it... It is in the current school district -- THAT at least will make life a bit easier to handle.. for a few months anyway... REALLY, wanted to keep Trevor at his current speech pathologist...since he is doing so well with her (although in the summer months he will be going to the college for it), Isaac will be going to Introduction to Kindergarten there, and daycare is right around the corner... Isaac will also be assigned to T-ball at that school's location if we are there... so I just really needed that little 'break' and something made easy -- the apartment isn't worth it AT ALL... really bummed, but it will just be temporary and should be an easy move.. up 1 flight of stairs.. not 3... like our other option...really not looking forward to moving twice within 6 months (max!!!!)  but I will do it for the end result!!!!  (CANNOT WAIT!)

The remainder of our house is heading to my hometown... in our boat and camper storage area.. at least we have that option in our favor!!!

wowowowow... much more difficult than I expected.. as my previous job searches were performed while I had a job, so you don't have time to dwell on it every single minute...second... of the day.

It is amazing what can actually be on that stressing scale per day.  First, the amount and reasons for the stress changes significantly EVERYDAY... We can go from... packing up the house, to I better stop packing as I need to leave it 'staged' ----to--- I have a great job opportunity and I jump with excitement every time the phone rings... to the downward ride of more disappointment or unanswered  questions that arise with every turn.... WOW.. I know what a confusing statement, but in fact--such is my daily life right now.  Really looking forward to a stage of "coasting along nice and slow... sitting back and enjoying life"....

I believe there is a light at the end of the tunnel... a dim one right now, but hopefully the roller coaster is speeding up as I am not so sure this mommy can handle much more of the unknown.  That just isn't in my nature... I would love to have LIFE all planned out... but I suppose that is in some very important hands from above and maybe I should really start to let him take more control... as he is already -- in control.  Maybe there is just one more "Hill" to conquer and then the coasting can begin--I can dream can't I??--I should work on sleeping, if dreaming is what I am after!)

Much advice has be given and taken...but the one thing I hear alot is.. " there must be something bigger and better out there waiting for you--or It's a blessing in disguise"... I sure hope that is true... impatiently waiting for that light!