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| Naughty Cars on top...get placed in the bottom bag if they misbehaved...Sticker chart for good behavior...notice Trevor's random stickers = hard to control...should have adapted that for a 3 year old...just FYI! |
What I needed to "accomplish" was disciplining in an apartment...(I used to be more strong willed at letting both kids cry it out, but I thought for the sanity of my neighbors, I would try something else!). One of the charts the examples I found used coins to take away as punishment...we adapted and used "CARS" hotwheels of course--it has proved to work well (Isaac hate losing car card, as much as he hates when a really hotwheel is missing).
The boys and I decorated the charts together... I bought 1 orange poster board and cut it in half, we used a grid I printed to set the goal sheet in place and it can easily be replaced when full! We used duct tape for a road... Isaac thought I was crazy until we put cars by it... then we had some random stickers and I found some clip art I printed and cutout to glue on to decorate the poster board to start out on the behavior chart adventure!... Each board has a large ziploc baggy on top and a small baggy to catch those naughty cars on the bottom (and we use it to store the sticker sheets to apply)...Staple them on good so they don't shift too much. They had so much fun with it. They just love projects- wish I had more time and room for them now- so if you make one be sure they are helping!! Isaac asked so many questions throughout the project and how it was going to work, etc...there was no need to explain it in any more detail from there. He is his Dad's son after all... Joe loves to question and question too. They were both so excited that they could earn rewards that both kids had 3 stickers before any cars were taken away = what a great start to the new disciplinary idea!... Wow am I smart... ha.... that didn't last long.
Ok so first...how it works... they each have their own chart.
On the top of the chart are 6 "cars"..these get taken away if you are naughty. We simply (ha) say, "Do you want to lose a car?" Sometimes it stops at that...others they loose a car. If they take away their own car then they only lose 1 (depending on the naughtiness--it has been know to lose 4 at once --yikes!) if us parents have to remove the car because they are having a fit, or what not...then we take 2 cars away. Isaac HATES that...cuz he has to stop his tantrum. (This is why it works for him!!!) If they are missing any of their 6 cars they don't get a sticker for the night, but if they have all 6 they receive their sticker!... We check the chart before bed every night and if they have cars taken away, they are put back on top for a fresh start tomorrow (actually because of the bedtime issues, we have been starting over then...so sometimes when they wake up in the morning there are already cars missing.)
They can also earn their cars back if the have done something nice. -- shared a toy, helped out around the house, ate their SUPPER!!, were good at daycare (bad at daycare they loose 2 cars), etc... IF they still have all 6 of their cars, they get a sticker for being good!...
We set a goal for every 10 stickers and they get rewarded...some are more expensive ideas, most are free or cheap!...We went to the movie Brave today for Isaac's reward (Trevor got to go too...the down fall of 2 charts, but I was sure to remind the boys this was Isaac's "choice" and maybe if Trevor is nice he can pick one next time!!) --good movie btw (Brave)-- $1 toys are great...Next is school shopping (Isaac picked it!!--he picks them all) So, that had to be done anyway!
So that is the gist of how it works... if you are naughty you lose a car -- have all your cars at the end of the day you get a sticker...replace cars to start over for the next day or by being nice! Earn stickers by doing nice things throughout the day, or having all your cars before bed!
EASY RIGHT??! It works for Isaac, I'm not saying he is a great listener all the time, but timeout and talking things through with him, usually worked fine -- so the chart was really developed for the trouble-maker, Trevor James....
How Trevor uses the chart...
Mommy says take away a car...Trevor asks happily with fingers in the air showing "one or 2 Mommy??" like its no big deal...When you show him there are cars missing like he only has 4 at night he just says,"OK!" and goes to bed...Isaac is totally depressed and wants to stay up so he can earn a few more back... When Trevor earns a sticker...suddenly there are 11 extra ones all over his chart. Which is also hard to figure out when he has reached a goal, because he won't let you assist him in placing his sticker in the charted area...he's just happy with a sticker... He hasn't ever gotten a reward officially for him> like I said we all went to Brave, but????
Isaac gets SUPER irritated with Trevor, so much so that he almost loses a car, just after receiving a sticker, because Trevor either took too many stickers from his sticker page, or can't put them in order...or Trevor even put one on Isaac's chart once...who would have known the melt down that would create...and "I ruined" Isaac's paper when I peeled it off and some paper came with it -- oh yeah -- I am talking about Trevor being the naughty one!! ha....
I honestly don't even know how to correct the mis-communication of how the chart works to him? Is that what it is???? Stubborn? I don't have the slightest clue how to correct his current behaviors...He isn't HORRIBLE ALL the time, but when he is, he is just soooooooo very persistent...In a restaurant like today at supper = I am done Daddy...wanting to leave the table, but we aren't Trevor... "I am done", "I am DONE"...louder and louder, until we leave and he thinks he as accomplished his goal of leaving...and being so persistent. We are going out very little after tonight supper... yikes...Isaac too -- he just can't sit still...must have ants in his pants or something?
So... NEXT behavior idea? We have 2 months left in the apartment...not sure what else to improve on for myself or him? They do trade nights of falling asleep in my bed now, and bedtime has improved...It's my night!... That is all the fight is about now... and that is easily resolved.
In conclusion, does a behavior chart work = very well if the child understands it -- not very well if not.
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